Friday, October 16, 2009

Soon....

Today I had my INR tested and it was a thin 3.1 so I should be ok in the clot department.  It just makes me so nervous.  My chest hurts less today so the goal is to go running tomorrow to continue on with my journey here.  I think the hard part is restarting after a little blip like this.  It honestly makes me want to just give up and take it as evidence that I am not meant to run.  Every time i try it seems a few weeks in something happens and I get derailed.  It seems that it is just not meant to be and trying again, especially in something I really don't like all that much, takes a lot of effort.  I just don't think people get it.  I am trying to remain determined though so tomorrow I run.

2 comments:

  1. Sarah-- first off, congratulations! Sometimes I still feel like a "fake" runner, too. I don't know if this helps, but even after years of running, I will still get derailed by all manner of things that are way less devastating than a pulmonary embolism. Don't let it get you too down. Weight Watchers has a really great saying "Do what you can TODAY to make yourself healther". Don't worry about yesterday or the day before, or tomorrow. Do what you can today.

    And I have to agree, exercising has really changed the way that I view my body. I'm not thin, and likely never will be. But I am strong. And I can even see that in the mirror.

    Love you, and am so proud of you!
    A2

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